|This picture has nothing to do with anything. I just love it! I love this fountain! And the flowers! |
So for lack of anything else this is what you get!
I've been learning a lot about hope, and excuses, pessimism, and faith.
Tonight as I drove down the darkly lit highway I consciously brainstormed about things that I want--ways that I want to be involved in and contribute to the world. We know that God will give us according to our desires, so why not think about the things we want, the good things we want and how to reach them? Instead of our fears and what we would prevent and how. It's so funny, I lived many years in fear, making good choices, but out of fear, fear of what might happen if not.
So for example, if my siblings don't know I love them, well, what when temptations come, what will they choose? Will they have the self-confidence to choose wisely? It is almost laughable now, as if my love had the power to make someone else wise. Hahaha. Oh goodness. Somehow I had it tied in my mind though that love really was the answer to everything (it really just was my misunderstanding it)--that if everyone felt love from where they deserved it, their intimate family, in the way that they needed it, (healthy, of course), well, then of course they'd make the right choices that will make them happy. Oh goodness. I could go off on an educational philosophy tangent here but I won't. (Though it would be interesting to have a companion site that did go into all of that stuff :) Seriously though, I am just now realizing how naive a thought that is. And it guided my life, my thoughts, and actions for a very long time. wow. Anyway.
Instead of making the choice to love as a means of preventing potential problems in the future, with my eye focused on the risks ahead, why not make the choice to love as a means of enabling to accomplish righteous desires and dreams, with my eye focused on the potential blessings or solutions ahead? Thus the focus is not on what is feared and fantasized, with the actions following to prevent it, but on the goal--ie what is real--with actions following to enable others to achieve it.
While love is the pathway to choose in both regards, I believe that the end focus has an impact on the way everything plays out. And seriously, I'd much rather that others make choices to love me with an eye toward my success rather than in fear of my failure because, well, usually for the most part I choose to live with an eye of faith toward my goals as opposed to the reverse and when someone's focus is on my potential failure, well, it puts a wedge in the friendship. It comes across as the other person not believing in me. When maybe they do, but their focus is on the wrong thing, their fear as opposed to the goal.
I think our actions will be a lot more effective for our good and for others' good if we choose to focus on our righteous goals instead of our fears, or what we would prevent. It is a sorry thing to think that instead of helping someone, through helping to prevent some future thing, that the reverse is what actually takes place, perhaps in part because of our paradoxical influence. It makes a difference what we choose to think about and why.
I've spent so much of my time ruminating about all sorts of different stuff and it's a little weird for me to make the switch to thinking about things I want all the time, and what I'd like to do about it, good things of course, but I'm excited to play this out and stop worrying, honestly. What a relief that would be! :) I've stopped worrying about a lot of things but yeah I think I still ruminate about a lot of pointless stuff that just doesn't need as much time or attention as I give it sometimes :)
I have a lot to be grateful for. My faith, family and friends, and yes my enemies too. I've learned a lot from everyone. It's amazing how intertwined everything is and how many gifts everyone has to share..and how that's contributed to what I know now. Life really is beautiful. People are beautiful. There is something good in everyone, and in every situation, no matter how rough.
Have a great week everyone and try to focus on the positive ;) Something may happen, you never know what...